Author Topic: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia  (Read 6830 times)

eastbound

  • Cortez Bank Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 2898
    • View Profile
SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« on: May 01, 2019, 12:04:14 PM »
https://www.nytimes.com/2019/04/30/sports/sunny-garcia-suicide-attempt.html

depression sucks--and it's real, and it's dangerous

take good care of any of your people who might be afflicted

check in on them often, and make you they know youre out there, you care about them, you have their back, and you will be there if they need you--there is research that says this helps depressed people more than meds or talk therapy
« Last Edit: May 01, 2019, 12:26:07 PM by eastbound »
Portal Barra 8'4"
Sunova Creek 8'7"
Starboard Pro Blue Carbon  8'10"
KeNalu Mana 82, xTuf, ergoT

Windwarrior

  • Rincon Status
  • ***
  • Posts: 221
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #1 on: May 01, 2019, 12:53:43 PM »
I wholeheartedly agree brother!!!!
Recently buried my 15 year old neice that hung herself in the garage after watching some freaks YouTube channel giving people a step by step on how to "end the pain." To add insult to injury, he plays kids tunes in the background to get around YouTube's rules apparently. It really sucks.

So yeah, I totally agree with you on the constant reassurance of letting your loved ones or just friends KNOW that some out there IS caring about them.....no matter what.
Hala Carbon Hoss
#2? TBD!!

RideTheGlide

  • Peahi Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 613
    • View Profile
    • Email
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2019, 01:44:41 PM »
We really need to get past the stigma of mental illness. It's an actual illness, not a character flaw and not a bad mood. When someone has the flu, people offer to mow the lawn or wash the clothes or do other chores for them. When someone suffers major depression, a lot of people just try to cheer them up. Offering practical help like doing chores is a really good thing to do. It really can be that debilitating.
Different things work for different people; don't dismiss meds out of hand. Doctors can and do over prescribe, but one of the most common situations in mental illness is the cycle of going off meds, feeling better at first (there are some side effects that it's nice to get rid of) and then crashing and burning, going to a dark place until convinced to see the doc again.
2016 Naish Glide 14x30 GTW
2017 GoPlus 9'9" x 6" iSUP (generic low end all around)

eastbound

  • Cortez Bank Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 2898
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #3 on: May 01, 2019, 03:45:54 PM »
excellent add, rtg---i plan to offer help with specific chores also (ive got a close family member with depression, in case it wasnt obvious)---depressed people can be immobilized---good time to stop by, do the laundry, cook a meal, clean up a bit---i like that very much--might do some of that this wknd--after i surf dawn patrol sat am!!  gotta keep my own head right too!

sounds awful ww--sorry for your niece and your family
« Last Edit: May 01, 2019, 03:47:25 PM by eastbound »
Portal Barra 8'4"
Sunova Creek 8'7"
Starboard Pro Blue Carbon  8'10"
KeNalu Mana 82, xTuf, ergoT

Dusk Patrol

  • Peahi Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 808
  • PNW
    • View Profile
    • Email
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #4 on: May 01, 2019, 04:09:43 PM »
WW, my condolences... maddening and surreal.
Bullet V2; RS 14x26; New Deal 9'6; BluePlanet 9'4

Windwarrior

  • Rincon Status
  • ***
  • Posts: 221
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #5 on: May 01, 2019, 04:31:51 PM »
Thanks fellas!
I honestly don't know which was worse. Hearing the news or hugging my sibling and feeling the pain as all the uncontrollable crying occured and the collapse in my arms.
Hala Carbon Hoss
#2? TBD!!

Area 10

  • Cortez Bank Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 3919
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #6 on: May 01, 2019, 04:56:05 PM »
Windwarrior, thatís an absolute nightmare situation, and I am so sorry. As a parent myself, I just donít know how Iíd ever find a way to cope with that.

Depression is the biggest killer of young people. Itís extraordinary that we donít get lessons in school about it, when there is so much emphasis on road safety, stranger danger etc, which are much less likely to kill you.

One of the manifestations of depression can be social withdrawal. So the person might not ask for help. They might not even recognise the symptoms themselves. So itís not like someone broke a leg and then will ask for help. But they need it nevertheless. It can take a bit of perseverance, and you canít be guaranteed that youíll get thanked for it at the time. But it also might be the best chance you ever get to save a life. So, yes, we need to be patient. And offering practical support is an excellent idea. Listening too, without dismissing.

RideTheGlide

  • Peahi Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 613
    • View Profile
    • Email
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #7 on: May 01, 2019, 05:14:44 PM »
I have been lucky, depending on how you look at it. I have been to the ER twice with a kid after purposefully taking too much of something then deciding to come tell me. What really got me was when I was talking about his future not long ago and he said he really had not made plans because he didn't think he would live this long. He is much better now, making plans and doing things to achieve them.
I have been in the abyss. It's a nasty place.
2016 Naish Glide 14x30 GTW
2017 GoPlus 9'9" x 6" iSUP (generic low end all around)

mrbig

  • Cortez Bank Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 2421
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #8 on: May 01, 2019, 05:16:11 PM »
Windwarrior, The loss of a child is excruciating no matter what the circumstances are. In your
situation my heart goes out to you and your entire family.

To be as present as you can is a wonderful gift that you have already given to your sibling.

May you continue to hold each other in your arms and hearts..
Let it come to you..
404 Go Go 14'
404 V3 12'6"
SMIK 9'2" Hipster Mini Mal
SMIK 8'8" Short Mac Freo Rainbow Bridge
Infinity 8'5" RNB
SMIK 8'4" Hipster Twin
King's 8'2" Accelerator SharkBoy

RideTheGlide

  • Peahi Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 613
    • View Profile
    • Email
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #9 on: May 01, 2019, 05:17:49 PM »
Oh, yeah; never, ever, ever, ever play the guilt card (think how bad everyone would feel). Just help. I let a pro do the heavy lifting.
2016 Naish Glide 14x30 GTW
2017 GoPlus 9'9" x 6" iSUP (generic low end all around)

rbgar

  • Sunset Status
  • ****
  • Posts: 286
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #10 on: May 01, 2019, 05:24:33 PM »
Heard he tried to hang himself, he was dating a nutter google executive girl last year, Maybe that stuff went south

Windwarrior

  • Rincon Status
  • ***
  • Posts: 221
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #11 on: May 01, 2019, 07:05:14 PM »
Windwarrior, thatís an absolute nightmare situation, and I am so sorry. As a parent myself, I just donít know how Iíd ever find a way to cope with that.

Depression is the biggest killer of young people. Itís extraordinary that we donít get lessons in school about it, when there is so much emphasis on road safety, stranger danger etc, which are much less likely to kill you.

One of the manifestations of depression can be social withdrawal. So the person might not ask for help. They might not even recognise the symptoms themselves. So itís not like someone broke a leg and then will ask for help. But they need it nevertheless. It can take a bit of perseverance, and you canít be guaranteed that youíll get thanked for it at the time. But it also might be the best chance you ever get to save a life. So, yes, we need to be patient. And offering practical support is an excellent idea. Listening too, without dismissing.
Yeah, it was a COMPLETE and unbelievable nightmare to go through.

When I flew into town I went to the house, which is when the collapse occurred and then after all my siblings were together, I walked away real quiet like and went into the garage where it all happened. I sat down and just got an overwhelming sense of being. Got goosebumps and just looked up towards the 2x4's where they found her and tears just started rolling down my face. I felt soooooo weird sitting there, in the barely lit garage. I was picturing what could've possibly been going through that poor girls mind while she did all that.

Her sister walked into the garage while I was sitting there looking up. Mind you, before I arrived my siblings were instructing me to not ask her sister any questions because she was fragile and they were concerned about her following her sisters path. So, I was blown away when after she walked into the garage, she just started giving me a step by step on how it all went down.

My sibling was on the phone talking to her brother (neices brother-my nephew who was out of state at the time) then everyone started asking where she was. They realized she had propped a chair up against the garage door from the kitchen. So they basically kicked through the door until they could reach in and push the chair away. Next thing that ensued was frantic screaming and yelling for help. Now, my nephew is just listening to all this over the phone because my sibling had just dropped the phone to reach her and try to prop her up and save her. By then it was too late. They got her down but she was all blue. They still performed cpr until paramedics arrived but she was already gone.

So my niece is rattling all this off while I'm sitting there with tears rolling down my face and I'm just in awe that she's decided to even talk about it. She even showed me her shoes and you could see what appears to be where at some point she stepped on her own shoes. As to try and change her mind to save herself or something.  Damn! This is all still very fresh.

Sorry to even put this on a forum such as a paddle boarding forum but when I read the initial report that started this string, I just got flooded with emotions and couldn't resist responding and well, here I am.

I HOPE anyone that reads this really takes this to heart. Living through this nightmare is ABSOLUTELY HORRIFYING! I hope reading this will really help change somebody's mind about attempting something like this.

This has destroyed at least a dozen people. Not to mention a 15 year old that is gone forever.
Hala Carbon Hoss
#2? TBD!!

Windwarrior

  • Rincon Status
  • ***
  • Posts: 221
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #12 on: May 01, 2019, 07:18:46 PM »
I have been lucky, depending on how you look at it. I have been to the ER twice with a kid after purposefully taking too much of something then deciding to come tell me. What really got me was when I was talking about his future not long ago and he said he really had not made plans because he didn't think he would live this long. He is much better now, making plans and doing things to achieve them.
I have been in the abyss. It's a nasty place.
I'm embarrassed to say it but, I've been down that path once. I was 15. It was in the 80's back when there was some nut job lacing tylenol pills with cyanide and people were being killed. I downed a bottle of 250 tylenol pills and went to bed. Later that night I flew into the bathroom and started throwing up and couldn't stop throwing up. Parents couldn't understand why I was puking until I told them what I had done. Next thing  I know dad threw me over his shoulder and bolted out the door while mom is in tow screaming bloody murder and starting the car. Yeah, THAT wasn't very fun AT ALL.

One thing I can certainly be thankful for is the fact I failed in that ridiculous attempt of taking my life. I wouldn't be able to tell everyone the wonderful stories of things I've done, places I've been, people I've met and the loves I've encountered.

It's difficult to describe what triggered that event. It boiled down to losing my first love and extreme heartbreak that followed.

I think RBGAR might've nailed it with the "going south" comment. Some are ok with love loss and some are not.
Hala Carbon Hoss
#2? TBD!!

Area 10

  • Cortez Bank Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 3919
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #13 on: May 01, 2019, 10:18:55 PM »
Windwarrior - I am so very sorry. That is absolutely horrendous. Words fail me: Iíve sat here staring at my computer screen trying to think of what to say. But, really, Iíve got nothing. Thinking of you guys at this extraordinarily painful time.

eastbound

  • Cortez Bank Status
  • *****
  • Posts: 2898
    • View Profile
Re: SAD NEWS--Sunny Garcia
« Reply #14 on: May 02, 2019, 05:46:22 AM »
hang in there WW--take care your people, as you are doing--all you can do
Portal Barra 8'4"
Sunova Creek 8'7"
Starboard Pro Blue Carbon  8'10"
KeNalu Mana 82, xTuf, ergoT